On the way to the park, I thought of all the times that I'd felt left out. I could still feel that hollowness settling in my stomach and that heaviness pressing against my chest when I'd find out that friends were doing something I wasn't a part of. I was on a mission to include everyone in any celebration that my family hosted.
A septate uterus is one of several possible congenital anomalies of the organ, meaning they happen during fetal development and are present at birth. It’s not known how many women have uterine anomalies because there’s no standard screening process to detect them, according to Scott Sullivan, an OB/GYN and director of the maternal-fetal medicine division at the Medical University of South Carolina. “The estimates [for uterine anomalies] I've seen have ranged anywhere from one in a thousand to one in two hundred,” Sullivan tells me.
With my first baby, I shared many of the same challenges as the other worried, overtired and overwhelmed new moms in our playgroup—breastfeeding struggles, sleep regressions and battles with diaper rash. But there was always one thing none of the other parents could relate to: my son’s plagiocephaly, a.k.a. flat head syndrome.
I’ve done everything to keep this kid by my side. I’ve bribed him, telling him “If you stay with me, we can get a new Hot Wheels car!” I’ve told him about stranger danger, which has prompted him to point at people, yell “Stranger!” and then run off. I’ve strapped him in a stroller, only to have him wiggle and scream like a rabid animal. I’ve tried carrying him, too, but it was like trying to hold a little breakdancer popping and locking in my arms.
Thank you so much for coming to my house for the playdatetoday. My son adored playing with your daughter, and I know he’s looking forward to the next time they get to hang out outside of school. I’m all about honesty in a relationship, so I wanted to write this email to address something that’s been on my mind since you left my house.
Since I’ve had kids, I’ve created a whole new network of friends who have kept me on course throughout this wild journey. What I never expected about parenthood, was how hard it would be to create and maintain new friendships with people. Things like naps, parenting techniques, and exhaustion end up making or breaking potential mom-friendships.
It was too quiet in my oldest son’s bedroom but my gut told me he wasn’t napping. My youngest was peacefully curled up in the Bjorn, snoring against my chest.